The Crotchety Old Spinster

If you’ve been reading for a while, then you’re familiar with my aunt Julie.  She is lovingly referred to on my blog as The Spinster.  Now, you might wonder why I would be so mean as to call my aunt a spinster, but then if you knew us, you wouldn’t question it at all.  She’s only 5 years older than me and she’s about as far from a spinster as you can get.

She’s always going off on trips and adventures.  Like a couple or so years ago, she and her friends took a trip “out west”.  She likes to geo-cache and ride around in her jeep with the top off.  I like to live vicariously through her because her life is way more exciting than mine.  So, to answer the question of why I call her a spinster, the only true answer is:  Because I want to.  And because I can.  And because I like to give her a hard time. You should hear some of the names that she calls me.  🙂

Being as close in age as we are, we are more like sisters or friends than aunt and niece.  We’ve had MANY adventures together over the years.  From owning a business together to trying to transplant a tree from her yard to mine (and subsequently killing the tree – sorry pretty little redbud tree).  We drove to Detroit one year to watch our beloved Cowboys beat the Lions and had a blast getting up to mischief at the expense of Nancy & Suzie before we left (that is a story for another day) and also in downtown Detroit where I attempted to aid a drunken Lions fan who had fallen on the ice in the street and the spinster laid rubber on the road leaving him in the dust before I could even get the car door open.  Good times.

We’ve had bike wrecks together, done home improvement projects and have played many a prank on my poor unsuspecting husband.

Once when he was asleep, we took a stamp that had her name on it and stamped it right smack in the middle of his forehead.  Haaaaa!  That was so funny!  We even practiced on each other first, so we could test how much pressure would be needed to make a clear impression without waking him.  We’re very thorough in our pranking.

You can read about more of our fun stories here, here and here.  Oh and let’s not forget the amazing feat that she pulled off here.

Yup, she’s a good old spinster, I wouldn’t trade her for the world.

And if you didn’t catch her comment in my post from last week, I’m including it below.  It’s quite hilarious.

In response to the poem This Is A House Where Children Live, the Spinster wrote:

“Have you also heard this much-beloved version?

This Is a House Where a Spinster Lives

You may not find things all in place,
Friend, when you enter here.
But, you’re now in a home where a spinster lives,
For that you should show fear.

And you may find doggy footprints,
And hairballs in the hall.
Who knows when she’ll clean them up.
If she ever does at all!

For there’s one thing of which we’re sure,
This spinster’s not here long.
When she should scrub and clean and such,
She’s in the garage playing ping pong.

So when will the spinster have a well-kept house,
Not til the grave has pulled her down.
Right now, this is where a spinster lives,
In the dirty part of town.

Spinsters Rule!”


15 thoughts on “The Crotchety Old Spinster

  1. auntju March 3, 2010 at 9:17 pm Reply

    I made the blog! I made the blog! I made the blog!

    What a tribute! What a glorious, well-deserved, long-awaited tribute!

    I’ve dabbed the corners of my eyes with my lace hanky and blown my nose in the same… the sentiment was overwhelming!

    I bow in your general direction.
    Thank you,
    The Spinster

    • klutzymama March 3, 2010 at 9:19 pm Reply

      I knew you’d be thrilled. 😉

  2. Tana March 3, 2010 at 9:42 pm Reply

    Yes, I had 2 big sisters! UGH….as you can imagine.
    Love this picture!

    • klutzymama March 3, 2010 at 9:50 pm Reply

      Oh the fun we had with you back in the day! 🙂

      • auntju March 3, 2010 at 10:34 pm

        After the wretched chili trick she played on me the other day, I think we should have some more “fun” with her. You in, cracktoe?

  3. Gretchen March 3, 2010 at 11:25 pm Reply

    I dabbed my eyes as well. It was truly beautiful and absolutely poetic. I must say I missed The Spinster’s poem but I do so love it. I cannot wait until The Spinster puts together her very own book of poetry. And we will call it “The Spinster’s Very Own Book of Poetry”.

    • klutzymama March 3, 2010 at 11:48 pm Reply

      Ha! I would love to read that book as well.

  4. klutzymama March 4, 2010 at 1:54 am Reply

    The ol’ cracktoe is always in for torturing my sister. 🙂

  5. Fencepost March 4, 2010 at 3:27 am Reply

    You guys are too funny!!

  6. mel March 4, 2010 at 1:20 pm Reply

    Man you have too much fun in your family!
    hugs to you all!

  7. Kim March 4, 2010 at 1:50 pm Reply

    Smiles all around here. Makes us miss you all! We would love to live in your quaint little town any day!

    • klutzymama March 4, 2010 at 1:52 pm Reply

      And we would LOVE IT if you guys lived here as well. Especially the girls, they love your kids so much and always have so much fun with them when you’re all here visiting. 🙂

  8. Kim March 4, 2010 at 2:05 pm Reply

    Cole often says, “Mom, let me see Hannah.”

    I don’t know if your little town would survive us or not. Don’t forget, Brad is driving now. 🙂

    • klutzymama March 4, 2010 at 2:07 pm Reply

      Oh that is so sweet!

      Aaaaah!!! No way! Oh my – and Maryka will be driving soon also, this town would definitely be in trouble! 😉

  9. Jen March 5, 2010 at 1:58 pm Reply

    Fun stuff!

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