Well, you should never do that because it’s plain mean to start with. But especially if you are prone to getting yourself into embarrassing situations, as am I, you really shouldn’t do it.
Now, really this situation isn’t all that embarrassing. I mean, I’ve had some doozies in the past. You know like falling on top of Hannah at her pre-school Christmas program in front of Santa and Mrs. Claus, or sitting in something icky and then having Hannah scream in front of the whole playground “MAMA, DID YOU POOP YOUR PANTS?!”
Or how about the time I accidentally jammed my toothbrush up my nose while brushing my teeth. Okay, I’ll stop. I think we all know that I could go on like this for days.
Back to the story! I’m sitting in the line of cars at Hannah’s pre-school waiting to pick her up when the mom in front of me gets out to retrieve her kid. Well, she has some sort of long piece of paper or sticker or something stuck to the side of her rear. Kinda half way hanging on there really. It was really long. I almost think it might have been the long sticker that is on new jeans that says what size and style they are. Know what I mean?
So, what do I do? I being the one who is constantly embarrassing myself? You’d think that I might roll down my window and say “Hey Laura, you’ve got a big long sticker hanging off your butt! Might wanna remove that.” I mean, that’s what I would want someone to do for me. And especially because I really really like this mom.
But no. I didn’t do that. I just sat there and stared at it. Then I chuckled and said “How embarrassing.”
Well, turns out, I was mere moments away from getting what I deserved.
I am wearing this really pretty necklace today that my MIL got me for Christmas a couple of year’s ago. It’s got a silver chain and a big round glass medallion-like thing on it. It’s blue with silvery brownish greenish stuff in it. ( My ability to describe things in intricate detail is amazing, I know.) It’s real big. Like olympic medal big. Okay, not that big, but it’s big. And heavy. And pretty. And you notice it when I wear it. I’m sorry for not getting to the point, but the size of the necklace is important to the story.
The chain that I wear it on is long, and it’s got lots of details in the medallion, so I only ever wear it with like a solid colored black shirt. Because you don’t need any more going on when you’re wearing a necklace of this calibur, okay? You feelin’ me now?
And I’ll just go ahead and be completely honest, I feel pretty awesome when I wear it. 🙂 Seriously. I do. I rock.
So, anyway, I go prancing in to pick up Hannah with my rock star necklace on and I’m bending over to help her zip up her coat when I feel someone pick something up off my back. It seems that while I was at the dentist earlier, laying on my back in the chair, that my necklace got turned around and was hanging half way down my back. And I had no idea.
And the teacher says to me (her exact words, I kid you not), “Um…doesn’t this go in the front? How embarrassing.”
Haaaaaaaa! Okay, so I totally deserved that, didn’t I? Oh yes, I did.
I have to tell you about Hannah’s teachers. The main teacher is real bubbly and sweet and just exactly what you picture a pre-k teacher to be like. And the teacher’s helper (who also happens to be one of the Spinster’s BF”s from high school) is about the exact opposite. She’s very droll and has an extremely dry sense of humor. Which is precisely why I love her to death. Yes, she was the one who pointed out my fashion faux-pas. And to make it worse, I was at the dentist like that. Then I went to the pharmacy to pick up my prescriptions. Feeling cool in my necklace. I may have even brought out the double guns a couple of times and winked at a few people.
Moral of the story: Do not make fun of people.